Custody-Not The Fight You Want


Custody is difficult and painful.

Custody is difficult. It's painful. And it can have a devastating impact on your kids. So it's important to make sure that you put them first throughout the entire process.

Here are some things to keep in mind:

  • DO remember that custody is about the kids and not about the parents. Make sure that any decisions you make focus on what's best for them, not what feels right to you emotionally.

  • DO define the problem before trying to solve it. The court will never agree with an emotional argument, so work together with your attorney or former partner to identify exactly what needs to be decided and how it should be decided before asking for a formal ruling from the court or presenting your case at trial (assuming you can't settle without going through this process).

  • DO think about how you'll keep yourself focused on your child's needs rather than on your own emotions throughout this process – especially if things get tough and ugly between you and your former partner. If emotions start getting out of control, consider using a mediator or parenting coordinator so that neither of you ends up making decisions based on those emotions instead of on what's best for the children involved

It's important to remember your kids come first here.

It can be difficult to keep the best interests of your children in mind when you're going through a custody battle with an ex-partner. It's important to remember that your kids come first here. You may have been so hurt by your separation that it's tempting to seek revenge or fight tooth and nail. But, if you have kids, they'll pay the price for a long time if you bring them into this arena with you.

Your divorce is over: your kids don't need to be caught up in another war zone, especially not one that revolves around them. They shouldn't feel like they are being dragged back and forth by their parents as hostages in a bitter battle over "who gets the most."


Don't let your emotions get the best of you or you will probably make a lot of mistakes.

When going through the stress of a divorce, it's challenging to be objective and make informed decisions. That's because your emotions are running high. They can blind you to what's best for your family. Your lawyer's job is to protect their rights and interests, not yours.


Don't make the mistake of assuming that it's in your children's best interest if they spend as much time with you as possible (or as little time with their other parent). Kids need two parents who can put aside differences and do what's right for them. Winning custody doesn't mean you win points for being the best parent.

No matter how big or small a role you play in raising your child, it matters. Given that most people would say that parenting is one of their most important roles in life, don’t take this decision lightly or give up easily.


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You are going to need to put a little bit of work in to make this work out, but it will be worth it in the long run.

It's not going to be easy. You are going to have to work with your ex-spouse and make things as easy for them as you can. You both want what is best for the kids, so don't let it get personal.

You're going to have to compromise, but don't compromise too much. Don't agree to something that is not in the best interest of your child. Don't let ego or pride get in the way of making a good decision for your child.

And most importantly, be willing to put in the time and effort required to make this work out for everyone involved


Custody battles are never easy, but they can be resolved in a way that's better for everyone involved.

Keep your focus on your children. Their needs are the most important thing, so keep them in the forefront of your mind. Anger is a normal reaction when you're going through a custody battle, but keep it out of the courtroom and away from your children. This will make it easier for them to adjust to their new living situation.

If you cannot come to an agreement with your spouse, then seek legal help right away. An experienced family law attorney can advise you of your rights and responsibilities.


If you want, you might want to consider working with a mediator for custody before you go through any formal procedures as this can help make things easier on everyone involved- especially the kids.

If you want, you might want to consider working with a mediator for custody before you go through any formal procedures as this can help make things easier on everyone involved- especially the kids.

Using a mediator can also reduce some of the stress that comes along with fighting for custody of your children. While no one is going to tell you that divorce is easy or that fighting for custody is all fun and games, there are ways to make life easier and the process better for everyone involved.

Working with a mediator can be more cost-effective than hiring a lawyer and going through the court system. Again, this means less money coming out of your pocket and it means less time spent in court as well which is good for everyone involved!


Make sure that you seek legal representation if you think that you could be better served with the help of an attorney.

  • There are two types of custody that apply to the court, including legal and physical.

  • Legal custody is when a parent has the right and obligation to make decisions regarding the health, education, and welfare of their children.

  • Physical custody is when a parent has access to their child where they spend time with them at specific times during a given month.

  • When parents share joint physical custody of their children, they have equal access and rights to those children. They split time equally between both parents. This can be in small increments or large blocks of time depending on what works best for the family.

Seek legal counsel for custody and try to resolve things peacefully.

When it comes to a custody dispute, you will want to seek legal counsel as well as attempt to settle the matter peacefully. Because custody is such an emotionally charged issue for many parents, it is best handled by an experienced attorney whose goal is to ensure your rights and wishes are upheld during the process.

If possible, you and your spouse should seek the help of a mediator who has experience in family law matters. The mediator can tell you what legal options are available and help you come up with a parenting plan that is acceptable to both sides. He/she can also recommend lawyers who specialize in child custody cases so that each parent receives fair representation throughout proceedings.


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